How to become your partner's soulmate
Think about the happiest long-term couple you know. Like all similarly satisfied couples, they went through three distinct relationship phases. This workshop will provide an over-arching model for the development of successful relationships, identifying key hallmarks of each phase. I will also debunk the notion of “soulmates” while describing how two partners can become eachother’s “one in a billion” perfect match. A mentally-stimulating workshop for anyone who wants a birds-eye view on the life course of happy marriage.
So High on Love, So Likely to crash
Explosive feelings of attraction are sometimes thought to be the mark of “true love.” In fact, science shows that what we are really experiencing is more like a form of addiction. We will discuss the chemistry of love (if love is a drug, which one would it be?) and how this affects relationship decision-making. Past attendees of this seminar commonly say that this information has fundamentally changed the way they see relationships and has equipped them to make much better choices going forward.
Got Your 6: Six Ways to have your partner's back
Learning to love well is a skill that can be developed with insight and practice. This seminar presents 6 of the best ideas for how to love your partner in a way that will make you irreplaceable and precious to him or her.
Why is conflict good for us and how can it strengthen our relationships?
Conflict (done well) is critical for the health of close relationships. During the dating phase of a relationship, conflict helps us determine whether we should commit to a relationship. In the committed phase, healthy conflict deepens intimacy, makes us stronger, and helps us love each other more fully.
How to have a good fight
How can we fight without damaging the one we love? This small group experience dips into both research and clinical examples to provide practical strategies for how to do conflict well. This is not standard “couples communication” curriculum – if you come, you will learn something new!
The psychology of infidelity
This workshop will explore fascinating research to explain why happily married partners cheat, what motivates some to continuously cheat, what must happen for a couple to repair a relationship after infidelity has occurred, and what can be done to lower the potential risk of infidelity in committed relationships (which research suggests most people are not doing).
"The Bachelor": A case study in what not to do if your goal is long-term love
With a weekly viewing audience of over 10 million, “The Bachelor” is cast as a modern fairy tale. This workshop pulls back the curtain on a multitude of unseen and under-appreciated biological and environmental cues that compel poor-decision-making in real life relationships. This analysis, while playful and often humorous in nature, demonstrates what we must be aware of if we want to avoid heartbreak in the real world.
The dating practices of very happily married people
In 2008, I gathered research (The Lifestyle Poll) on more than 600 very happily married individuals. The divorce rate in my sample was less than 6% (a strikingly lower divorce rate than the 50% failure rate of first marriages). This seminar examines the dating practices of this group and tells the story of how happy marriages are formed. This group is ideal for singles who want to learn how to date in a way that is most likely to lead to a strong, mutually satisfying marriage.
The following 2 sets of paired talks are conceptualized as a two-part sequence but may also be offered as stand-alone groups/seminar topics:
Series I (an entertaining and insight inspiring series for singles)
Part I: "The Bachelor": A case study in what not to do if your goal is long-term love
Part II: The dating practices of very happily married people (see descriptions above)
Series 2 (good for singles, and especially recommended for couples)
Part I: Why is conflict good for us and how can it strengthen our relationships?
Part II: How to have a good fight (see descriptions above)
Any of the following topics can be scheduled in the future or provided to groups ranging in size from 8-12 participants (for small groups) to large scale events. Please click here if you want to discuss the possibility of having me speak to your group.